Excused

For the kindness there was gratitude.
Not here for that not here for this.
The tears were spilled and the indifference swift.
Betrayed by what was not mine.
Scripts convey the experience and time.
Like a leaf in autumn it fell from the heights.
I knew that I created this but it wasn’t what  had designed.

For a heart to be hurt it has to be committed.
The pain was unbearable and don’t care to relive it.
Enough of me is left to recognize the power I give it.
Not me and not you give a care about who did it.

At this point there is no need to point fingers.
The damage done, the fire is out and like the scent of smoke in my clothes and in my thoughts you linger.
I was reckless and selfish and also thoughtless.
Remembering my behavior makes me feel nauseous.

Words were said to me that bled me.
Found hurt that only comes from silence indifference is deadly.
It’s not hate that hurts because that is done with passion.
Cast out of heaven so too you will be as thunder as it crashes.
We burned everything around us and danced in the ashes.

So what now where do you want to go from here.
Absolutes go all the way until it thins and disappears.
I don’t want to hear excuses about why you can’t follow.
You say you are strong but you are actually hollow.

Not much left to discuss when the topic is us.
There is a void where there was once trust.
Realized that this was love but for you it was lust.
As ashes rain and pain settles over everything like dust.
Supposed to be a friend yet we kill each other when we must.
Look upon you and I’m filled with anger the resentments and disgust.

Won’t say anything to anyone who ask me how it ended.
I’ll just have to believe that you are better off friendless.
We have things that most people don’t want to excuse.
Long memories, big egos, and pride that is easily bruised.

– Jose Serrano

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